Wrestling. The distillation of good and evil. There is a good guy and a bad guy.
I have a good friend who is a wrestler. I went to one of his matches the other night and I was totally engrossed. Rolls of unravelling toilet paper and crepe paper tossed into the ring. Neon mohawks, tattoos, boos and hisses. Large blubbery thumps and noisy crashes. Flips and other acrobatics. Primitive, you say? It was wonderful.
Good and bad. Not so in real life? My new discovery is, that, even as the managers in the wrestling company do not enter the ring without knowing how to take a fall, the same is true with life. After years of seeing the character flaws in people and sorting through the many nuances, I have come to this conclusion: You are either good or bad.
Take a look at what I consider good. My doctor changes out of his Halloween costume during a crazy party and even though it is in the middle of the night, he makes an emergency house call. Good. The friend next door listens to my woes, hearing me tell the same story again and again. Good. The fellow artist shares her own techniques, gallery contacts and juried show opportunities. Good. The person at the grocery store when my green bean bag breaks. This good person hurries away to the produce section at the back of the store and selects new green beans, clumps at a time. For me! Good.
Ok, you say, where is the bad? And, by the way, I am the one in the ring here, I am only talking about myself and my experiences. I take the falls. I fall against the ropes. These people could be doing nice things for others. But I doubt it. Here we go: The person says good things to me, bad things about me to someone else. Bad. The person lies to me. Bad. One enters my studio, goes through my things, snoops around without my permission. Oh and steals my Booker T. and the MGs disc from my CD player! Bad. You are getting it. One more. A person cheats me in a business deal. Bad. Oh, I used to say, the person is from that type of culture. (Could be this culture.)… That is part of the game. Nope. Not anymore. Bad. Bad. Bad.
Back to wrestling. I go around now, doing the things that cause me to occasionally interact with people and I think of wrestling. No one is passing out rolls of toilet paper for me to stream at the good people.Thank God. And I don’t get the urge to throw a pie in a person’s face here and there. Thank God, again. But, good and bad. It keeps things simple.
Copyright Hollis Hildebrand-Mills 2015 All Rights Reserved
Hollis Hildebrand-Mills 
If I read that correctly, the good outweighs the bad, so you are in a winning situation. I was fortunate at the grocery today when people kept picking up the many things I dropped and putting them in one of the canvas bags I keep on the back of my power chair to haul the groceries home. Good. Almost an all good day.
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Yes, I have to see that the good outweighs the bad. You are right. It is so nice of you to comment here, Angel!
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I haven’t seen your posts for quite a while Hollis. Are you okay? Or is it me and my darn shoulder keeping me from my computer that is the problem maybe.
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No, Angel, I have found it hard to get back to blogging. I can post, no problem, but I never have thought it fair to just post and not read my followers’ blogs as well. Therefore with limited time now, I am posting less. But I do miss it. And i miss my followers’ blogs and what they are up to. Blogging is an enriching experience. Thank you for asking about me. Very touching.
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Good, bad, black, white . Yet our worlds are full of colour. But you are right, Hollis, we are reacted to in either a good or bad way. Snooping, taking your stuff – definitely bad, bad, bad. I had someone go through my private things – it’s more than bad – I can sympathise. But wrestling? I can’t picture you at wrestling – did you join in with the hissing?
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I will say this, Jenny, as refined as you are, if you were sitting beside me at that match, you would have gotten a lot of laughs out of it! It is full of drama and fun! As far as hissing though……I didn’t want to spit on anyone.
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Refined? Where on earth did you get that from? I’d be right there with you, hurling my loo roll, booing with the best of them. 😄
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Have to say, wrestling better then boxing! Glad you are back at the studio!
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Yes, wrestling is so entertaining! It’s meant to be full of drama! Are you back from Spain?
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Yes, had a fabulous time. Even toured a bull ring and looked for Ferdinand!
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Yep, Ferdinand might have been just around the corner! 🙂
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I am so glad are “back to work,” Hollis. Your artwork will inspire me, along with others, to keep our focus on our ‘crafts.’ I am happy to be able to start reading you here, Hollis. I try not to use black or white, bad and good labels, but see where you are going here with these connotations.
I think sometimes people are going through a ‘bad’ day, but may not overall be ‘bad.’ Their actions on any given day may be so different from the body of their whole life’s work or behaviors.
Taking and stealing personal items is so wrong. Very sorry this was going on and wish the scoundrel to have some bad karma! I also don’t like people who talk bad about their family or ‘friends,’ behind their backs. Not good. Bad.
When someone steals to help feed their family or takes something which is not theirs, something which will help another, I tend to be like Robin Hood, thinking of the end result. I mean, no guns and no killing. Never acceptable or excusable, in my mind.
I have empathy for the people who are put in the same jail for stealing milk or bread, with the ones who were stealing liquor or dealing in drugs. I also hate to see someone getting in major trouble for not paying for something. Just thought delineating where I bend the rules may be of interest and pertain to this subject.
I wish the guy who stole my car would not have done this, but was grateful my insurance paid for the replacement parts which were wrecked in his thrilling car wrecked stolen escapade. I am grateful I have a roof over my head but still resent my ex for not helping us to keep our house. I am more sad that he went on to get his PhD, just to be ‘for fun’ while he didn’t care enough to help me complete my own Master;s… he is not bad, but broken. I am stronger for these trials and tribulations, since I am like Elton John’s song, “I’m Still Standing.”
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A lot of this post, is, because of limited time and energy. And, because I am so kind, it gets mistaken for weakness. Therefore, the bad……. I get your points and I will probably get back to those, forgive me, movie, “shades of grey” soon.
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Hi Hollis! Oh I have missed you and hoped you were okay. I am sorry for the bad…but glad for the good. Sounds like you have had a lot of wrestling to do in and out of the ring. It gets exhausting doesn’t it? Wish I could give you a great big hug…but will send a cyber one at least… xoxo
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Oh, Sherri, how kind of you to comment. I have been such a terrible friend. I am almost paralyzed with family and grief issues and everything is slow-going. But I am getting ready to get “back on the horse!” Beginning with looking you up and tracking down what you have been doing in that little blue summerhouse of yours. Thanks so much for your insight about “out of the ring” and for caring.
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Hollis, I have been thinking of you lots too lately. I also find it tough to keep up with so many fellow bloggers who now all seem to carry 2-4 blogs EACH. It’s overwhelming to try and keep up, esp. when family is taking a center-ring. Loved your wrestling post here and hope it did bring you some needed fun and laughter. 🙂
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Thank you , Patricia. Yes, my artwork has to come first, even though, at times, I would rather be blogging. I think you are the same way. I see your posts of exhibitions on Facebook. so I figured you are in the same situation, in a way. Although, as you are aware about how I feel about FB, it is easier in some ways than WP, at least time-wise. Thank you so much for checking in!
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I think people are layered and complicated but their interactions with each individual usually do break down into good or bad. I’ve had people who were bad to me but were good to others and vice versa. You can’t help categorizing someone based on your interactions with them because that is the side of them that they show to you. 🙂
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Kourtney, you are correct when you say that people respond to different folks in different ways. I am dealing in absolutes here and that basically is wrong. I guess what I am trying to say, is that everyone has the ability to be their best self and it is so disappointing when they are not. I think integrity is the finest attribute anyone can possess and I am pompous enough to believe it is the only thing we leave behind and/or take with us when we die. Not saying I don’t fall short of this, but I really wish people would try harder to, at least be the best they can be. Man, that’s heavy. Sorry. And you are so busy. Just what you needed to read, huh?
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Absolutes are nice and clear. Much easier to deal with. 🙂 I agree with that. We as people have choices every day. Sometimes we choose wrong. Sometimes we take our issues out on other people. Sometimes we lash out and sometimes we’re just mean. I do think moral compasses have gone awry and no one seems to be concerned about being their best self just getting the most attention. No worries–heavy is okay. I like chatting about different things. 🙂
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I’m sorry you’ve had these experiences with bad people 😦 Sometimes working in a school, it also seems as if there are people doing bad things all the time. Just a minority, but so disappointing/depressing the way some people live their lives/the way they have allowed their upbringings to drive them into negative ways of coping with their situations.
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That is such a nice way to put it, Denise. Their UPBRINGING! So forgiving. Thanks for stopping by as they say, all the way from your new home. I hope you are enjoying it!
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